It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
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Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
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you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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