Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
