Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Help me help you realize you are a moron
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
