I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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