I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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