I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
