Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.