Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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