His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
