some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
