He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
