Whod you bang
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize