He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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