bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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