it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
