Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
