Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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