There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize