After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
