SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
