So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
