Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
