never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize