i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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