No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
