No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
