So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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