if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
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