You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize