i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
i only shaved half my leg
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.