i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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