She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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