Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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