i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
