i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
