I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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