I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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