have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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