break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
