they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
