Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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