why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Operation Purity has been aborted
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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