you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
