Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
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The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
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what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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