butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The beer is more important than you right now.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
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