I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
