Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You were trust falling into bushes
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
