Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I had to cum in my sink.
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