Me. At least after what I've been through.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
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