HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
